Bill Burr Crashes Facebook Sequel Party, Hilarity Ensues

Hold onto your privacy settings, folks, because Hollywood's most unexpected sequel just got a whole lot spicier. Bill Burr, the red-headed rage machine from Boston, is officially joining Aaron Sorkin's The Social Reckoning – yes, that's the actual title now, not "The Social Network Part II" like some boring corporate sequel.

This cinematic train wreck of modern digital dystopia has assembled a cast so stacked, it makes Facebook's board of directors look like a community college debate team. Jeremy Allen White is playing Wall Street Journal reporter Jeff Horwitz, Mikey Madison is tackling whistleblower Frances Haugen, and Jeremy Strong is stepping into Mark Zuckerberg's hoodie – which, let's be honest, is probably still unwashed from 2004.

Burr, whose comedy career has been built on telling uncomfortable truths louder than your neighbor's leaf blower, will reportedly play a fictional character – or as Hollywood likes to call it, "a composite of several people we can't legally name without getting sued into oblivion." Given that this is the guy who once called Philadelphia "a one-bridge-having piece of s***" to a room full of Philly fans and somehow made them love him for it, he's probably the perfect choice to tear into Silicon Valley's greatest hits.

Seafood Trucker Hat

$28.74

Save 35% ($10.06)

Sale ends: 12d 12h 3m

Sony Pictures has officially set The Social Reckoning for an October 9, 2026 release, strategically positioning it for awards season because nothing says "Oscar bait" like a movie about how social media destroyed democracy and made teenagers hate themselves. Filming kicks off October 20, 2025, wrapping by December 10 – just enough time for Sorkin to write approximately 47 walking-and-talking scenes through Facebook's Menlo Park campus.

The movie draws inspiration from "The Facebook Files," a Wall Street Journal investigation that exposed Facebook's internal research showing they knew their platform was basically digital heroin for teenagers. It's like if tobacco companies had internal memos saying "cigarettes cause cancer" but kept selling them anyway – except instead of lung disease, we got political radicalization and body dysmorphia.

Seafood Tote Bag

$33.51

Save 32% ($10.72)

Sale ends: 9d 12h 3m

Sorkin, who won an Oscar for writing the original film (back when winning an Oscar still meant something), is pulling double duty as writer-director this time. This marks his fourth directorial effort, following "Molly's Game," "The Trial of the Chicago 7," and "Being the Ricardos" – a filmography that proves he's really committed to making movies about people who talk really, really fast while walking.

Meanwhile, Burr's keeping busy with a slate of projects that sound like they were pitched during a fever dream. He's got "Born Losers" in the works, plus "Leo 2" – a sequel to Adam Sandler's animated lizard movie where Burr voices a turtle named Squirtle (because apparently Pokemon copyright lawyers were asleep at the wheel). He's also starring in "Hate to See You Go" alongside Morgan Freeman as aging blues musicians who refuse to retire – which, honestly, sounds like a metaphor for half of Hollywood.

What makes this casting particularly delicious is that Burr has spent years ranting about social media's toxic effects on his podcast, often sounding like a prophet screaming into the digital void while everyone around him doom-scrolls through TikTok. Now he gets to channel that righteous fury into a movie that will probably be seen by dozens of people who aren't checking their phones during the screening.

Seafood Unisex Sweatshirts

$50.21

Save 34% ($17.07)

Sale ends: 10d 12h 3m

The original "Social Network" captured Facebook at its most innocent – when it was just a college networking site that helped you stalk crushes and share photos of keg stands. Now, fifteen years later, Facebook has evolved into Meta, a company so committed to virtual reality that they're spending billions trying to convince people to have meetings as cartoon avatars. It's like watching your high school overachiever friend grow up to become a cryptocurrency influencer.

With Burr on board, "The Social Reckoning" promises to deliver the kind of blistering social commentary that makes audiences simultaneously laugh and question their life choices – you know, like reading the news in 2025. If anyone can make corporate malfeasance and digital destruction somehow entertaining, it's the guy who turned a crowd of hostile Philadelphia sports fans into fans by insulting their entire city for twelve straight minutes.

So mark your calendars for October 2026, assuming the world hasn't ended by then and movie theaters still exist. "The Social Reckoning" is coming to remind us all why logging off might be the smartest thing any of us could do – right after we post about it on social media, obviously.

Seafood Unisex Shirts

$42.41

Save 34% ($14.42)

Sale ends: 12d 12h 3m